It wasn’t till April 10th, 2010 . Charles and I were back together. It was a relationship that I didn’t trust. No one knew. He could do what ever he wanted with out me finding out. Which I believe he did.
It lasted a few months. My mom was finally okay with him and I talking again.
His parents didn’t know about me.
We wanted to go on our first date. It wasn’t super romantic or anything, but it was a big step for us. It lasted 5 hours and I didn’t get a ride home. The most painful thing to remember about this is to his family I was still just a friend. They didn’t know me, or know that he had another girlfriend. When I got home, he sent me this long message, of how he was upset with me. I didn’t remember doing anything. At the end of the day he told me when he is with one, he misses the other, and he broke up with me. WORST DATE OF MY LIFE!!!
I believe I was depressed. I wasn’t myself after that. I cried a lot. Listened to depressing music, I didn’t want to do anything that reminded me of that relationship. The fact that we went to the same school, and everything didn’t help.
The beginning of senior year. I saw him, and her happy together. I ran out the lunch room in tears. I couldn’t breath, I couldn’t think straight. I wanted to die.
I loved him so much. And I couldn’t have him. It was so hard seeing the one you love in another persons arm. But she was happy!
I tried dating other people. Didn’t turn out the way it should. I went out with one of my friends older brothers. We talked for awhile, but soon as I seen him in person, it was over. I was back to my depressing self. Charles tried to talk to me. About getting back together but I wasn’t going. I wanted to tell Mickela so bad, I just didn’t know how. He put a message on facebook, about me and him talking, and she broke up with him. I called her, and I told her the truth. He talked about getting back together with me, but I had no intentions of repeating junior year.
For the first time in a year, him and I had no communication for a month and a half. It was hard ignoring him. I didn’t hate him. He went to one of my friends, to get to me. Before I knew it he broke up with Mickela once again. He came to me. We probably talked twice during this time. I told him no, and nothing would change. I wasn’t getting back together with him. We would cry on the phone together. I couldn’t lie to him, I told him I love him, but I love myself more. On special conditions we got back together.
SPECIAL CONDITIONS:
1. No one could, unless we both were ready to make thing public!
2. I had to meet his family!
3. He couldn’t be all over Mickela!
We got back together In February things got more serious between us. Valentines day, I had to work so we couldn’t be together. So the weekend was ours. Lets just say it was weird, and awkward.
A couple weeks later I was suppose to go over his house, and I couldn’t make it. He sent a text to me that was meant for his mom saying. “Lauren can’t come over, can Mickela?”
I called him cursed him out. 2 hours later we were back together.
With the help of both our moms, we decided to make out relationship public. It was weird but I was happy.
Even with Mickela knowing, it didn’t stop her from making out with him on the 4th flr of our school, then she told me 3days before Charles and I birthday… I was devastated. I didn’t go to school the next day. Once again I was depressed. I talked to her, and I told her that it was karma, for what I did to her last year. I found a lot of things about my boyfriend. And it was all very painful stuff. My 18th birthday was ruined!
I made Charles suffer with me in emotions for two weeks. Before I forgave him.
For the past 6 months, we have been really happy. Everything has been peachy. We went on prom, and he came to my graduation! Majority of my family loves him, and I met just about everyone worth meeting in his family!
There are some days, like today that I think back to the older days. And I don’t know how I stuck around. For anyone reading this or for anyone who has been through this, or is going through this… You always have to remember a few things, How much you are worth, What will you do for love, and do you really love the person the person you are going through this with. There are times when I feel like I deserve better, but I know I am not perfect. I would do anything for Charles, and I love him so much!
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